Passion...Drive

How is it that passion can come from something so small and simple, like a conversation with a friend and yet also come from something so huge as a conference? How is it that passion can die out so quickly when put back in a normal setting? Why is it when you are passionate about something, it is so hard to sometimes act on that? Why am I so trapped in a moment where I am so driven by my life, my faith and church, that I find it so hard to act upon things? I find it so easy to sit and talk to friends who share similar passions and desires, yet I cannot bring myself to act upon what I am so passionate about? Why do I shy away from moments that I can put my passions into things or say what is burning in my heart? Why is it that sometimes opportunities are not always given for others to share passions and desires?

I have so many questions going around my head at the moment, where I have just come home from my Hillsong Small Group and a conversation with the lovely Meagan Wilson. I have so many things that are not my heart atthe moment, so mnay things I am excited about, so many desires, so many concerns, so many challenges and it is so hard to start listing them and talking about them or even begin to answer some of the questions above.
It is way past my bed time, especially on a Uni night, yet coming home from the Wilson's house after a challenging and passionate small group and an awesome conversation with Meagan, I felt I needed to share my thoughts. There are so many things I see a need for change, so many desires, which are on my heart and so many challenges that I was faced with tonight. I honestly don't know where to start. I believe it is all about conversations, and I guess I have started with my conversations with the people in my Hillsong Small Group and with Meagan, after it. However there is so much more and so many steps that I believe need to be put in place for things to happen, for desires and visions, to become reality, for passions to be followed through with and for my challenges to be wrestled with.

When I came back from Hillsong, I was so driven for my faith, for Youth Ministry and for passions in my life. I was so excited about life. However it didn't take long for the fire within me to start to diminish, where I was getting into the swing of my life again and other things came up. Once again, after Vetamorphus Retreats there were so many things I was excited by and encouraged by, however that fire diminished also. Furthermore, I have had conversations or mentor session where I come away so excited, passionate and driven, yet always fall short of acting upon those things that are within my heart. So many events and circumstances, however big or small, create a spark within people, however so quickly and without recognition, the fire dies down within us. Everything I come away from, every event, conversation or circumstance sparks something within me, but it is only a temporary thing. This upsets me greatly and I do not want this to happen this time. I am adament that I want this conversation with Meagan to continue, for my passion for church, youth ministry and faith to continue and for excitement in all my relationships and in my life in general to continue. I do not want any of it to die down. I am so passionate at the moment and so excited about what the future holds for my life and the life of our church at Doncaster. I can see great things happening within that church, as we do not only have a fantastic leadership team at the moment, but we have an awesome group of young adults coming through at the moment. We have so many capable people in our church and I want each and everyone of us to be used, to be apart of God's plan for our church, to achieve the call that God has for our lives. I want action to start happening in my faith, in the church and within every aspect of my life. I am excited about what the future holds.

Why wait for action, create it!